Kismet, Strong, KDK - Dear gals, thanks so much for your advice and your concern for me... I am indeed very up and down. Trying to detach but yet can't. I guessed I am holding-on till at least end of January. Each time I want to just say "F**k it", I think of end-Jan that at least I could do is TRY to be somewhat of a nice perfect wife till then....but it is soooo bl@ody hard when your WAS is behaving like an @ss!!!
Friday... Had the day off from work. Took the boys (plus friend's two boys and little niece) to badminton classes in the am. Yup..Felt like a SUPERwoman...with 5 kids in the car. Was quite a full day... went shopping in the pm with the boys (this time only my own 2 monsters). In the evening, while waiting for BIL, my MIL and I was sitting in my lounge when I got a call on my house phone... S5 answered it. It was H and S5 said "Daddy wants to talk to you"...and guessed what??? H said that he couldn't come back tmrw (Sat) as intended because of work commitments. At that point, I was rather calm and said "okay. whatever you say. up to you. Tell you boys yourself"...to which he replied "if you think she is here, she is not" and I answered "whatever" very very calmly without any emotions in my voice. Put down the phone and told my MIL. She was like rolling her eyes.... Anyway, had dinner with BIL and MIL plus the kids. Some friendly text exchange in the night between H and I. Nothing significant nor about R.
Saturday... Ooops overslept and didn't manage to get to my yoga. Went out lunch with girlfriends...then had dinner out at a restaurant with family (my dad's birthday)...Think he sent me a text? Cannot remember...
Sunday... AM - went to the supermarket to buy some disposable ware for my party in the PM. Boys stayed at home. Called home and found out that H was back in the house. Went home... prepared some stuff for our Xmas dinner. Went out lunch with H and the boys. Nothing major... Came home... not long, somehow, we had s@x and then had R talk...still the same. H still confused. One day he wants us, one day he wants ow. He says he has been sooooo busy at work that he hasn't thought about things...and he absolutely hates the idea of me talking to ow in end-Jan. That I will drag ow down in my talk. So, basically, I am not giving him any choice except to come back to me reluctantly..whether he is happy or not, he is "forced" to come back. Also mentioned that he MIGHT stay in the hotel or he MIGHT stay over at ow's house(WTF???) Anyway, didn't end in a good note... sent him a text to "go to her"...(I know..waste of $$ when he is just in the next room)...anyway, things swept under the carpet when friends started arriving at our house for the party. Party was great. This other friend (we all picked him to be the Santa because he has never really done anything for the kids so far...) dressed up as Santa and gave pressies to the kids. After the party, had my family Xmas dinner... H was around... acted "pseudo-normal" in front of my grandma, dad, mom and siblings...After dinner, my parents left and SIL/BIL stayed behind for chats...H did not join in...he was upstairs in the bedroom, watching telly or whatever. This is his sister we are talking about!! My SIL says "My brother looks like a dead zombie that is walking about without a soul. I look at your family pix. He looked sooo happy, and now, I see him..souless..really like a dead person".
