Listen to these gals! They know what they are talking about! Give it a little more time and see what happens. I think that is what I am going to do, although I am preparing myself for the D. But I'm not closing the door. You can leave the door open too, and still keep GAL and working on that PMA.
Wow, the food sounds great. Have any leftovers?
WCB
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
Sorry Beth no leftovers they all demolished them pretty quick but your welcome with Kismet for tea any time. Yes my door is slightly ajar for H ready to be kicked shut at any time but I wont rush it I promise.
VJ thanks for that and Lisa I agree VJ makes some short but good comments.
Must go and try and lock up Beth's thread again this has become a real obsession for me sad isn't it....Kim
Must go and try and lock up Beth's thread again this has become a real obsession for me sad isn't it....Kim
Sorry Kim ~ the artist prev known as BB got that honour.
Thanks for that drink~ will def. try that. May need to make a practice batch tonight.
Yes my door is slightly ajar for H ready to be kicked shut at any time but I wont rush it I promise. Now, don't slam it on H's nose ~ although I have to admit having a great vision of you kapow kicking the door on poor H's face. (yes I am a sick puppy)
Quote: Now, don't slam it on H's nose ~ although I have to admit having a great vision of you kapow kicking the door on poor H's face. (yes I am a sick puppy)
Hee, hee...ouch!! That would be a Kodak moment, no?
Wish I could take ya'll out with me tonight...oh the trouble we could get into!!
Hehehe that is a good vision with the door on H's nose so I don't think you are a sick puppy at all Kismet and let me know how that drink turns out.
Lisa yes we all could have a great time, oh well maybe one day when we are all rich....
Thanks for the support YoYo.....
Last night H came over and came with me to Volleyball but I think he was a bit bored and felt a bit uncomfortable my sister goes and she is not very talkative to him and I think he feels this. I have told him that he should apologise to her for lying.....Bit of History when H left me and had nowhere to stay my sister checked with me first and then offered H a bed for a few nights as she lives rather close to his work. H accepted this and whilst there my sister did ask him straight out if there was anyone else and my H swore there wasn't. My sister hates being lied to. As she says if he wasn't ready to admit it he could have said "Look I don't want to answer that, I just want to sort my head out first and if there was don't you think Kim should be the 1st one I would tell" My sister reckons if he avoided the answer somehow she would have been O.K. with the later revelations but she just can't get over that he lied to her. I have told H this and he says he will apologise for lying but still hasn't done it, so the more time that goes by the harder it is becoming for both of them. I just stay out of it.
Anyhow that is why he feels uncomfortable around her. H dropped me home after the game and then went home. It is weird b/c he rings me each day and will see me a couple of times a week but there really isn't a connection. I sometimes feel he does it because he thinks he has to. Anyhow a bit more time and we shall see.
Tonight S9 has cricket and H is meeting me there as he is doing Security work today at the Horse Races at Mornington although it is raining here today so it could be a wash out. I am then going to go and see my girlfriend and her beautiful little baby boy, am having withdrawals as haven't seen him for a week.
Tomorrow need to finish Christmas shopping and do all the wrapping and Sunday time to wash my little dog and clip his fur for summer and need to take my big dog down to the Hydro Bath for his bath so S17 is going to do all that with me and then we will stop at the Vets to get them their flea treatment to put on once they are all groomed and bathed.
So that is my weekend plans for this week oh and Jarrod may be coming over for a quiet drink Saturday night or even a coffee b/c we might go and see girlfriend little boy as he hasn't seen him yet.
Hope you all have a wonderful weekend catch you all soon....Kim
Looks like H's chickens are coming home to roost (must be getting old ~ I sound like my Poppa. He died this year & I am sure has sent down all his own sayings as they keep coming out my mouth ). Yes, I admit if I was your sister I would be pretty pi$$ed off at that lying episode.
It is weird b/c he rings me each day and will see me a couple of times a week but there really isn't a connection. I sometimes feel he does it because he thinks he has to. Anyhow a bit more time and we shall see.
Kim, do you think it is because he is still depressed or do you just think there is no connection or are you just hanging in there and seeing what eventuates?
Have fun washing your pooches? I really should clip my Cocker X as she is getting a bit boofy.
Kismet yes I think I am just trying to evaluate it all at the moment, I know enough time hasn't passed for the meds to have kicked in but I do have my doubts as to how mch difference that will make to him when they do. I just see things in a different light I guess or at least see him in a different light. I will just keep plodding along until I work it out by not doing any harm but not doing much else either.
My little dog is a Maltese x Shitzu so his fur has become quite long but luckily not matted and my large dog is a Blue Heeler x German Shephard so I can't lift him into the bath as he is just too big, hence the hydro bath. Maltese is called "Sam" and he is two and Big Dog is called "DJ" and he is 8 although you would think in age it was the other way around. DJ still runs around mad like a puppy and Sam just moves slowly and plods along as though he is very old. They get along marvelously but they are such opposites.
It is funny how we repeat the sayings of our folks and Grandparents, I sometimes stop when I am saying something to one of the kids b/c I can hear my mother or father saying the same thing to me when I was a kid, it can be rather freaky....
Not much advice for your sitch, you're doing great. Just hang in there and see if the rollercoaster is gliding to a stop or if you're gonna get to go for another spin. Sounds like your weekend is well planned; you're doing what needs to be done and having a little fun, too.
Have a great time!
Stop WaitingFeel EverythingLove AchinglyGive ImpeccablyLet Go
I've been meaning to post for a couple of days now as we seem to be in the same place in our stitches. Please don't give up. I think those of us who have suffered through the betrayal of an affair forget to look at the other aspects of our M (such as the one's that may have contributed to S being open to an affair) once the affair is over. We are just so darned relieved. However, there are a whole lot of other boards out there besides the infedelity one. Those of us here in infedelity have a whole nother step to this DB process. Now we (you and I) are where the other DBers are. It makes sticking with it that much longer and harder.
Also, I have found MC to be extrememly beneficial as it seems to be the place (the only place right now) where H's feelings for me are expressed. We have become closer. I know you said that h has a hard time expressing himself so this might be the place to do it. For me, it has helped alliviate a lot of my fears and really help myself understand that it will take a while for him to fall in love with me again. Also, it helped me understand that he did choose me and is committed to me and our M- it's just going to take A LOT of time. I was not getting this from our daily interactions. In fact, our interactions were a lot like yours and your H's. So I can understand your frustration and discouragement. MC REALLY has helped for this. I have also begun to share some of the DB principals (as well as others) with H and he is open to them. He knows (sort of) that I used this board and these books while going through this s**t and so they are valid in his eyes because he noticed the changes in me. I also think he appreciated the fact that I loved him enough to spend the time researching and reading this stuff. So, maybe it's time to share some of the philosiphies with H?
We spend so long in this process not talking about our R that it was hard for me to begin again.
). Yes, I admit if I was your sister I would be pretty pi$$ed off at that lying episode.
