Frank,
Our WAW's are acting 17 again. He's a playtoy, nothing more. She basically confirmed this. That means his days with her will end eventually when she gets tired of running from her life, or putting up with HIS. Then she will either face life with you or keep running.

so what do you think happens when faced with a decision of stay with H or stay with toy who has no long term implications (supposedly)

if she is acting like a child (which she is), wouldn't she choose the one with the long term possibilities? I know she doesn't want to lead the dating/single life...the decision that I think she faces is me and some work ahead of her to repair M or stay with OM and she knows that it will eventually end and then she WILL be in the dating/single scene but time will have passed and Vince will be long gone.