Ouch. W just called from her friends house down in Santa Monica. Her friend works for this school where they teach counseling from a spiritual perspective or something like that. She invited W to go to her work party tonite because her original friend canceled out. So she's not coming home till late.
All kinds of 'what if she meets someone?' 'what if she has fun and thinks being single is all fun?' are going through my mind.
It should be mostly women there, and weird 'spiritual' people so I shouldn't be worrying. But the pangs and fears are there. If we were still in our relationship I wouldn't care. Her friend is also someone who would introduce her to men, although she knows about OM so maybe she won't be pushy. I guess it also pisses me off becasue this friend is someone I helped with making a massage video recently. But then again I don't think she would have invited W to go to 'meet men' as the primary reason but just because they spent the day together and she was looking for someone to go with her at the last minute.
OK, so why am I scared? Should I be? It's just a party for crying out loud and she's "in love" with OM so nobody will be able to hit on her. Also, most people there will be in there 20's. (she's 37). Nothing to be concerned about, right?
I guess I just don't want her to have fun. She is supposed to be miserable without me. My fears are in overdrive. Is this a big deal?
