Quote: I agree. For me, the difficulty is the 'not knowing'. Not knowing what they are really thinking or feeling but having to have faith.
I have been reading your posts for awhile now Frank with a great deal of interest - havn't really responded as I can see you are working your way through a lot of stuff and I feel you are doing really well I find this quote really interesting
because this is 'theoretically' what happens when we GAL big time what usually happens however is that we continually tell how we feel - we spill out our emotions - we act like we are devastated by all this (of course that is human and we can't help it) but it doesn't help the situation at all imagine you going about and GAL so big and bright and behaving like everything in YOUR world is great and fine what will go through her mind she will not know what your doing what you are thinking what you are feeling the shoe will be on the other foot so to speak that is why GAL is so important - and I feel from your posts that you are now in a very good place to do this GAL does not have to mean on your own - you can do it with the children go do new activities together - be busy every weekend the key is to not ask your W along and wait till she asks can she come with you
I also suggest that if your W brings up the past at all to say nothing you do can change that and then change the subject Also I believe you have a lot of anger towards your W for not helping you with your depression/drinking the fact remains that nothing changed until you decided to do something about it I think you need to forgive yourself for your past behaviours - forgive your W for doing as much as you thought she should and look to YOUR future and GALing this is where I think things will begin to turn around for you bj
