It's hard not to read too much into any of our responces from WAH's, and I don't want to feel regret? you did? Alot of times after s@x, I did not feel regret. Have been detaching really really well and been using my H as a s@x slave, so to speak. So, when there were no cuddles whatsoever, I didn't feel sad nor any emotions. Because I wasn't expecting it. And the NO EXPECTATIONS really helped. In many cases, I think my H did feel closer "connection" with me after the s@x (as KML says...Men have s@x to feel love, whereas women need to feel love to have s@x). There was one particular time (this was after he moved out), he came back to have one of those "wham bam thank you ma'am sessions". I guessed I wanted it too and didn't feel sh*tty after the fact. But he was still talking about how he felt about the session about a week later...how he felt the intimacy. So, I guessed if it is drawing your H closer to you, I guessed WHY NOT? You just need to really really detach to not expect anything out of it. Just close your eyes and enjoy it...maybe perhaps imagining him as an Italian Stallion. LOL...
The reason why I felt kinda sh*tty about myself after our recent phone s@x session was not so much of the session itself...more of disappointed about my LOW willpower. I was adhering to this "being COLD and DARK" stance with my H. Pride aside, if you look it the other way..it is POSITIVE that he still wants to have a s@xual R with you, he could easily go to ow. In my case, H could have fantasized about ow, could have had the phone s@x session with ow. I guessed one other reason that I was feeling sh*tty is that the deadline I've imposed on H is getting near and I could feel the pressure and stress building up in me. And as KML commented very correctly, I was trying to lessen the hurt by controlling the situation... I guessed I've been in this sh*t for so long that I am ready to call it a day....
