Ok, I'm now beginning to become convinced that my H is really trying to make some real changes in his behavior. Partly because he wants to please me I'm sure, but it's also evident to me that he's doing this because he wants to as well. He appears so much happier lately, so much more at ease around me, so much less guarded.

Over the last week to 10 days or so his behavior has really noticeably changed towards me. He's become much more physically affectionate towards me, much more open to talking to me about...whatever, and is making many more loving/romantic/sexual gestures towards me.

For example...last night, I could tell he was tired so I wasn't expecting anything to happen except to hear him snore on the couch, but after I put our son down for the night my H invited me over to lay next to him on the couch (parallel so we were both facing the same way and he could put his arm around me to snuggle). This is something he hasn't done in the past, so I made sure not to turn down that offer. So I snuggled up next to him and he proceeded to tell me and show me what parts of me he finds really attractive. This just about sent my analytical mind into overdrive, but I squealched that and just enjoyed myself LOL. It didn't lead to sex, it was really just some heavy petting (primarily cuz it's that time again for me, what fun, mother nature does have a wicked sense of humor doesn't she?!) but it was just soooooo nice. It's stuff like this that has been completely missing from our M. The things that make me feel special to him....the things that foster that EC for me...and apparantly for him too. Then later that night...when we went to bed he comes to bed naked, yet another unusual thing for him to do, just to snuggle up with me, it was really a nice evening.

He's more fun to be around, he jokes more with me, he does more of the physical things that I like to me, and he's talking to me about important issues in a more relaxed manner, not so defensively. We talked about a variety of things last night.....his job, my job, porn (yes, I said porn LOL). Actually the porn topic was broached because of a game that he has...someone at work had mentioned that if he had the previous version of it they could give him a code to access a CGA porn movie hidden in it. He mentioned at that point that he told the guy he wouldn't want it, and his wife (moi') would have a fit anyway. I looked at him and kinda laughed and told him..."I don't have a problem with porn honey as long as I am aware of it and I know you don't use it to avoid me, that I get to reap the benefit of your viewing it. I'd have a problem with you hiding it from me though." He completely agreed with what I said. He told me he doesn't use it now, but he used to....but that he never thought I would have been open to it. This is a conversation that would NEVER have taken place a year ago for us....and we discussed it like it was nothing, very easily, no tension, no defensiveness, just like we were talking about anything else in our lives.

It's going to be so nice to tell our MC tomorrow when we see her, that I see definite improvement now....and that things are getting much better. Oh, and before anyone tells me I need to tell my H these things....I already have

GEL


Well behaved women rarely ever make history!