I am not sure what to say, I'm sorry that it is still a struggle for you. I know that you can't force sleep, vitamins and stuff on someone who might not want them (I know that I can't!) I think the one bad thing here is that the affair didn't end naturally, it didn't die naturally - which I expect it would have, when he finally realized the type of person she is.
For some reason, I'm not sure he realizes that yet. If he did, he'd probably be kicking himself.
I think the most important thing is to make a nice home, get yourself the exercise, vitamins, sleep, etc. Take care of you on a daily basis. It really helps. You cannot change him. No matter what you do or say, he can choose to do what he wants. Make your life happy, and hopefully H will see that as well.
I know it's hard, I don't know how you haven't kicked her ass yet, really. And I'd probably have forwarded that co-worker stuff to someone at the top get her fired.
Good luck in this! You deserve better than to be stressed out over everything going on.
