Coexisting Gracefully with the Unresolved

[sage]

Does any of this make sense? Slowly

Well, it makes sense to me since you largely described my h.

My h seems (an ASSumption on my part) to have a heightened sense of shame over things that wouldn't freak me out at all. I'm not sure the genesis of it but I'm certain that I didn't help it any during the bulk of our marriage when I was taking pride in slamming him during arguments and poking my nose into things that frankly were none of my business....

It's been difficult but I've dropped the rope on his behaviors as much as possible. He knows as well as I do what's tolerable and acceptable in this M. I refuse to be the watchdog for both of us anymore. I had that role for a long time and it, well, didn't actually get me anywhere. That's not to say that I never bring anything up but as Slowly pointed out, it's in small chunks and is as devoid as possible from judgement.

I know not everyone agrees with my approach (why would they? ) but it's lightened my load. I've got my hands full managing my own self.

Sage