I've been posting primarily on the Newcomers board, but I thought this question might be more appropriate over here. W has told me she has 'strong feelings' toward OM, is 'numb' towards me, doesn't know if she wants to work on it or not, etc. I've been DBing for a while now, and things are getting slowly but surely better.
But I fear Christmas might be a big ol' matzo ball for us. (How's that for mixing your religions? ) I have respected her confused feelings and have held back on the ILYs, big shows of affection, etc. But her b-day is 12/20, and I have always done a lot for the b-day and Christmas - for 10 years. So, what to do? Which way should I go? Should I go more in the direction of the way I always do, or should I step back, do something very small, you know, thoughtful, but not much?
Also, I find it extremely hard to believe that OM won't do anything for W for W's b-day and for Christmas, and I find it hard to believe W won't do anything for OM for Christmas. I think I know how to react to that, but I don't know for sure.
Anybody else in this dilemma?
Out with the old, in with the new
2006 will be better than 2005
) I have respected her confused feelings and have held back on the ILYs, big shows of affection, etc. But her b-day is 12/20, and I have always done a lot for the b-day and Christmas - for 10 years. So, what to do? Which way should I go? Should I go more in the direction of the way I always do, or should I step back, do something very small, you know, thoughtful, but not much? 
