OK, when giving advice I know it's helpful to offer possible solutions instead of just pointing out problems. But, I don't know your sitch well enough to come up with a possible solution right now. But, I am starting to see that the secret life you are living and the image you are maintaining with freinds and family is a huge burden to you. Maybe you could do some thinking about how you could ease that burden. I'm not saying to post a sign at your driveway and make an announcement on your voice mail message or anything. But, is there a way you could stop putting out the effort to keep up appearances? And is H getting upset about it a serious problem or is it just that you're uncomfortable when H is upset (most of us are uncomfortable when our spouse is upset).
After I read Shiela's post above, it just got me to thinking about how much it relates to your sitch.
