Hanging on/The Long Haul

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Phoenix, please come back and have your say. How have you been?

Wanna hear the best part of my day? the tractor tire! I went to pick it up at the farm tire repair shop. When you're born and raised and lived your whole life in a town of 15000 you know a lot of people. There was an older dairy farmer guy at the counter, and years ago when I was in grade school he or his wife picked me and my sis's up on their way by to take us to school. Well, the discussion was about drinking milk, he was getting picked on in good nature humor and he said he doesn't like milk and turned around to look at me for support. I said I didn't blame him a bit, I didn't like milk either, and with wide eyes said "do you know where it comes from!??" He had this look of on his face, and then everyone started laughing. How's that for the best part of a day? pretty exciting! can anyone top that???

So, as long as I was in town so late waiting for the tire, I thought I'd stay in town long enough for H to be gone to skiing already when I got home tonight. My timing wasn't good enough, or he was waiting, not quite sure. But, he was just finishing all the outside stuff, I dropped the tire off by the tractor and came in to change boots and jackets. Walked back out, checked and everything was done outside, got back to the tire and H had already put it on and was back in the house. I walked in and he was hustling his stuff together to leave, said see ya later and walked out. I went to start a heater, he walked back in, grabbed more stuff, walked out again. I was filling a heater tank, he comes back a 3rd time, he forgot his ski boots, and this time he looked at me and said see ya later. He really left this time. Not sure if he was really that forgetful or ???

Also, he has been very careful to avoid me or any physical contact with me. I will occassionally brush him if we pass but nothing lingering. Last night he stood behind me for quite awhile in front of the heater while watching tv. This morning he opens the bathroom door and walks in talking about a big snowstorm headed this way, undresses and gets in the shower. Am I grasping at anything? is this a small sign? and when I called him today about a pretty sore subject (broken handle) he was helpful and not a note of agitation in his voice, in fact, I was surprised he answered his phone knowing it was probably me.

Now, I say probably me. H has our cell numbers blocked from displaying when we make calls. We have one other friend who did that for a while but doesn't any longer, and I know OW had hers blocked as of the last time she called me. Saturday night while dining at our Christmas party H got a call. He said he couldn't tell who it was. I asked why not,didn't it display? He said no, it must've have been our friend. I said that guy no longer had his number blocked, it wasn't me calling him, and that left only one other person I could think of. H acted innocent, he didn't know who I meant, I didn't explain. But that does explain why when I do call him but don't leave a message, if he does call back his usual greeting is 'my phone shows you might have called.' It gets me everytime, he's got a 50/50 shot at getting it right who called.

Yesterday, after being outside most of the day I was very warm but the bottoms of my jeans were all snowy and frozen stiff. When I got thru the door I just peeled off my jeans and my first layer of shirts and left it on the floor for a while, after all, I was home alone for the day. It was still on a pile when H finally walked in, so I went to pick it up, and he said something about being so hot I had to take my clothes so fast? I commented back as I was scooping them up and going to the bedroom, I was hot on top and wet on the bottom. He did make a comment but I was too far away to hear it, and then it dawned on me a while later that what I said could be really be taken the wrong way!

Normally I would tell H thanks for doing my chores and fixing the tractor tire verbally or with a txt message. But tonight I will leave a note on the table for when he gets home, I won't make it a point to contact him. Maybe I can think of something cute and creative that he will remember. I've got a few hours yet.

Really do have to start on Christmas things. I did buy stamps tonight, and plan to create a card as usual to send out. The difference will be I am not asking or telling H or waiting for him to avoid it, I am just doing it. Ho ho ho.