Okay, I'm going to take a deep breath here - perhaps you should too. Understand that my PMA has not been the best lately and may be spilling into my thoughts including about your sitch. But, stepping back and looking, I have to wonder and therefore ask: is there anything to even want to keep this R going at this point? It's almost like you are watching him pour the gas on the wood, haul in extra things to burn and it won't be until he actually strikes the match and starts the blaze that you will step in - but by then it will be too late. It really seems like you are allowing him to run your life and you are at this point a somewhat willing passanger clinging only to some hope that it's going to work out and he is going to come to his senses. Is that a good idea? Is that an accurate assessment? It seems like you are starting to get to the end of your rope in that you were about to send him packing in his camper with his stuff. I'm not sure if that is the answer either. What I do think you really should consider is going dark to the extent that you can and protecting yourself financially. In the longer term you may really need to decide wheter this person is even worthy of you. Has he ever been? If this is all new behavior, that's one thing, but it almost seems to me like many of these things are chronic.

I think so many of us get so involved in DBing that we forget to look at the reality of our sitch. I used to look at so many people and say how crazy they are for allowing their S to ruin their life and jerk them around while they more or less just went along for the ride. Now, I fear I'm in danger of becoming one of them. Only you can decide if you are as well. At the very least a thourough and honest look at your sitch with a list of pros and cons may be in order. You may find that things have gotten so crazy that you really do pull back and go dark. Ironically, it may be at that point that H finally comes to his senses. I really think he may be continuing to do what he does for one huge reason - BECAUSE HE CAN!

I hope that helps give you a different view. Please use it only as one view - not as some sort of final decision.


DonH
Midwest
Me 56
WAW-EXW 55
Met 11/95 / Married 5/00
Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06
4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D