Sorry, chrome... it's so discouraging when you try something that you hope will "work" or something that has worked for other people in other situations. It was a good idea, and it worked partially... but the negative finish was kind of a downer.
I understand the point about not posting something here that you wouldn't want your spouse to read... but this is a forum for YOU to derive benefit. Do what will help you. And I'll say to you what I said to IHJ-- revealing your thoughts cannot damage anyone... if you just talk about YOU and how YOU feel. One of the things you're striving for is a marriage where you can truly be yourself. Expressing yourself here is good practice. The stuff that you think is so awful isn't really when you get it out into the light of day.
I was reading an interesting Jewish book about relationships the other day. Very religious Jews belive strongly in soulmates-- b'shert it's called: destiny. This book was saying that you have to be yourself, otherwise your soulmate won't recognize you. It's like a radio signal. You have to be sending out a true signal for her station to pick it up.
