I think the joint sessions you two are having is a good start. You attend self esteem counseling. Does she see anyone on her own? If she has her own fears and vulnerabilities, disclosing them in front of you may be too scary. She may do better one-on-one with a counselor, possibly a female counselor.
My statement about your gift giving was meant to warn you not to get too disappointed if she does not/cannot respond. I think most women want strong, confident men, the unison of opinion from the women on this board supports that, but I am still not certain all women can really accept that confidence, due to their unknown FOO. Since you may not receive the support from your wife, I would not assume it is intentional. She may need more time to work through her issues to realize how and why she is not/can not give you what you need. Just because she knows “everything” does not mean she is capable of doing anything with that information. In many ways, this is not her fault, though it is her problem.
