LFL, Yep! I did two things differently: I came to bed naked (which h asks for, always) even though it is *freezing* here. I just cranked up the electric blanket and it was nice. I haven't been sleeping naked cause I didn't have the elec blanket on and I would not have been able to tolerate it, otherwise. I do not handle cold well at all. Secondly, I tried out ol NOPkins' "place H's hand where you want it" technique to rousing success. (thank you NOP! A giant hug to ya, big guy)
You know, it was funny. At one point, I said to him, "H I think we should just keep going. No break for you!" He laughed and replied, "I know you were joking but seriously that is not a bad idea. The breaks get me all messed up and off track."
Karen and I have talked about this feast/famine dynamic so it was interesting to hear it validated by him.
What is also noteworthy is that he and I got into a pretty good argument earlier in the night. All my fault. I was ticked OFF at his mother, who is manipulative and I allow her to do it to me grrrr, and I took it out on him. Then our kids were driving both of us bananas. All in all, it was not the sexiest night we've ever had. Oh and then we got into a religious debate that, while it never degenerated into an argument, was not going well for a while. All his fault. NOT the best evening for ML! So that is another testament to how far we've come. In the past, one of these events would have derailed us for days. Now we were literally dissolving into tears (from laughter) right before bedtime; all had been satisfactorily resolved and apologies handed out.
Btw, Cobra, here is a question for you:
When delving into FOO stuff, why does it seem that your spouses' FOO crud is sooooooooo much worse than your own? I think that is part of the reason why I pooh pooh it sometimes. Because when I start to think about it too much, I find myself overly focused on HIS family. (they really are whackos, can I just say that )
I guess my real question is this: How does one go about quietly and firmly resolving their FOO stuff without stepping into other people's FOO issues? It seems to me that one begets the other. If I'm so engrossed in FOO stuff, I will naturally think about H's FOO stuff and then I'm off and running. I've noticed this trend in your own posts, as well. How do you keep it to yourself, so to speak? Any ideas?
Well, at any rate, I wanted to chime in and say that I'm feeling a lot more positive (obviously, duh!) about our frequency issues. I have no idea if this will continue or not but at least I have something to build on. This has happened one other time since summer but it was a bit of a fluke and not something that he intentionally set out to do. THIS time it was intentional and so it feels different, mentally and emotionally. You can build off an intentional thing..attempt to repeat it, in a way that is not so easy when it's a fluke.
)