Inspiration, snort. Just ask MrH if that description fits, LOL.
Things are really good around here. The thing that is different from other 'good' times is that we are navigating some tricky areas and still doing it with kindness, compassion, a great deal of ease, quick resolution and no lingering resentment. THIS is the amazing part.
Last night we had another frequency discussion. In the past, I would have been frustrated at saying the same things again and again. I felt that briefly but mostly I just laid back and said very little. I didn't have to. He knows how I feel and what I have stated would work for me. The entire convo had a tone of loving kindness to it...as if we were talking about one of our kids or something! It was incredible. Interestingly enough, we were doing lots of touching and I found myself getting turned on. THIS is a first. I don't think I've ever gotten turned on before by the "I need more ML" convo. As a woman, it feels awful to have to say that--as if I'm not enticing enough or something. I know this is not the case but I'm just relating how that conversation feels to me, not necessarily the logic or rationale behind it.
Anyway, the whole thing was lovely! Our EC is still rock solid, the best it's ever been. Our anni is Friday and I feel positive about our M.
Cally, did my emotional flu have anything to do with the current progress? Undoubtedly. I can't say specifically how..all I know is that there was a renewed sense of effort in his behavior, afterwards. He was willing to do things and try things that he hasn't been willing to do our entire marriage.
One of the things that stuck in my mind was me saying, "Did you really think it would stay like this forever? With me making most of the R effort and me being the one to want you all the time, while you sat back and decided whether you'd have me or not?" He had a weird look on his face...shock mixed with regret mixed with something else and said, "Well yeah, as dumb as that sounds now, yeah I did think it would stay that way."
So I suppose the biggest change (of late--there have been many changes on both our sides over the yrs) is that he now knows that the answer to the question is No it won't stay this way forever, so I'd better do something now.
Or maybe not. I'm guessing as to his thoughts; can't say for sure.
