Something has to change for the better, and H doesn't look like he'll be making that kind of change.
If you leave and take the kids, he will have the legal right to be with them, as MKM showed here this past summer. (different state, but the laws are similar enough). If he ever again gives you reason to fear for your own safety (or your kids'), you have cause to seek protection.
He's just back after being away so long and things are at this point already? Heather, you know I do not want to advise anyone to give up on their M. I would not advise a woman to take kids away from their father unless the situation were truly bad. Only you can make a decision to do something like that, but I am afraid it may be the best thing for you, the kids, and H. Yes, H. There are no guarantees, but some guys go through tremendous changes and personal growth when the effects of their actions come home to roost. (Look at some of us here.)
Take care of yourself and your kids. Don't let your reactions to his crap lead you to another "not your proudest moment."
You mentioned that you don't feel especially religious, but you appreciate prayers from others. Heather, God hears your prayers whether you were in a church last Sunday, last year, or last century. Give it a shot. What do you have to lose?
Prayers,
K
My sitch More importantly, Light A Million Candles
