You were talking about your plan of action - stay, go, whatever. Doesn't H qualify for a PFA? If not, what about taking the kids with you if you go? One thing I was thinking of is redecorating the computer room. Get yourself a nice bed. Put a lock on the door. Or put your foot down about tv in the middle of the night. Buy a tv for his bedroom. Put the living room tv in his bedroom. Give all the tv's to the Salvation Army.
You could just start behaving IN THE HOME in ways that are perfectly normal but really get under his skin.
I'm grasping at straws, but it sure seems like he's going out of his way to make your life miserable. There must be some way, short of War of the Roses, to gain yourself a status higher than nanny and housefrau.
Try a couple Alanon meetings and come back and tell me I'm wrong about them. It's a great way to get out of the house when he's home. You don't have to tell him where you're going. But it might get him to thinking. If he ever claims he doesn't believe you, you can invite him to come along. He'll learn something there. Sometimes an Alanon meeting takes place at the same time in the same church or hospital as an AA meeting. Just down the hall or something.
