Not being a religious person or even very deeply spiritual, forgiveness is sort of a foreign concept. I may have forgiven myself, I can't really tell. I'm not sure what that means.
Heather, I think that the main reason that I've been able to come to the point I'm at now is because of my faith in God. There have been times where I've questioned why God would put this upon me, but I've come to the conclusion that He let this happen and that if He did, I can handle it. There is a book by R.T. Kendall called "Total Forgiveness". I haven't read it yet, but it is on my list of books to read. I think that by totally forgiving WAW, I will drop the rope and move on without any problems.
No sexual advances by him, no encouragement by me. So that part seems to be going well and I'm glad because, at least for now, it's a boundary that I need.
This sounds like it is working for you. Congratulations on setting a goal and seeing it thru! Build on this success!
he actually drank a few beers on a night that is not a drinking night. he just had a couple beers around the house on a non-drinking night. It seems ridiculous to me and it is obviously still feeding his addiction.
I may have missed something here, but does H have designated drinking nights? Are they just when he is home? Is this part of some agreement b/w you two?
I do agree w/your assessment of his drinking being an addiction. Is it an escape? Has he ever gone to AA or counseling for this?
