You know your last paragraph is exactly ME and my Marriage...althoug my XH was never gonna leave...never...he believed then that you don't ever leave, no matter what...at least you don't leave physcially...emotionally if you ask him, he was not there for a long time.
And, by the way, I'm all for agreeing to disagree...it's something I've come to learn and accept and I continue to be around those that I disagree with...it's healthy, as there will be times that my eyes are opened wide to things I never thought possible. For the record, I didn't used to be this way. I'm just going to ask a few more questions and feel free to ignore me...
Quote: I am not sure what you think I am having trouble accepting. What I am struggling with at the moment is finding a compromise that suits us both.
Are you sure that your compromise approach isn't still attempting to change him? One of the first things is working on changing you...so just checking.
Quote: You have the maturity to figure out this...why think your H would not do the same with his friends?
I never said he wouldn't. I don't know if he did or if he didn't, it really isn't relevant. All I was saying is that hoping he doesn't wasn't part of my thought process cause we all cope in our own ways and if his way was going quiet, or going off and sleeping with someone else, it's what he needed at the time. I believe every person you come in contact influences our life in some way. Heck, you've influenced me and my choices and my thoughts about my XH and my experiences, what makes you believe that your husbands friends won't have an impact on him?
Quote: That is your view of a good friend... I am sure that works for you.
What would be your definition of a good friend? What works for you? I wanna know because I want to make sure I'm looking at it from a 10,000 foot view.
I'm not trying to be combatative here...just trying to work though as we always do.
Nickel
"The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy."
