Interesting day. I've been super stressed this week and feeling the pressure of not knowing where me and H are going. Being pretty sure that it's over but doubting myself. Today I hit my limit emotionally. Things are nuts at work. The other two analysts are out and we've had a ton of stuff hit the fan. By lunch I had a killer headache and was just tired. Filled to the top with it all.
Then H called about noon. It's funny when I feel like I can't take one more piece of bad news.. it comes and then I just have to set it all down and leave it there. That's what happened. Now I'm very relaxed and feeling good. I can't make any of this better, so it's better left alone!
H called and said "Is it OK with you if I quit my job?" I said, "what do you mean?" He said "If I quit my job today, will you let me stay at the house. Would that come between us?" He said he's sure he has a job offer coming Thurs from the guy he's been waiting on to contact him. He called yesterday and offered H the job, but won't discuss the details until they meet. He also went to an interview yesterday and is expecting a call in two weeks, and he has a second interview with a place tomorrow. Any of the three would be good jobs for him. I responded "as long as you continue to pay your half to the bills as we agreed it doesnt matter to me where you're working. I can't afford to support us without your income, but other than that, we'll continue as we have been" He did some verbal math trying to convince me it would be OK, I asked him what happened.
He was livid with one of the management at work. They have to pay quarterly parking fees for employee parking. On Mon, they asked him for last quarter fees and he said he'd already paid them. They said, no you didnt and he said well, I'll have to check and see if I have a check number and let you know. I looked and saw that he didnt pay last quarters and paid the quarter before late, so he thought he did because it had been such a short time between paying. The next day he paid the fees and got a receipt. Today, R called him into her office and said he was being reprimanded for making a false statement. This is a woman that H has went up against over his schedule in the last month. He took the issue to her boss and some of the discussion during the meeting made her look bad because she lied about giving him timely notice about schedule changes. So today, H felt like she was just gunning for him. There were two other managers in the room. H asked her to let him take some leave in the next week and she turned it down, so he wasnt happy to begin with. After he got off the phone with me, he went back into the room and said he'd like to speak with the HR lady in their main office (R's boss) because he felt it was three against one in the room and he has right to be represented in the meeting too. She got angry and told him to sit down and answer their questions. He said "why don't you just approve my leave and we can work this out when S gets back to work next week" She asked "are you threatening me?" He said "no, I'm not threatening you, but I dont see how I made a false statement and I'm not signing a reprimand" She came around and asked for his work badge and told him to leave for the day. Later he talked to her to get the phone number of the HR lady in the front office so he can be advised of his rights. She told him to call tomm and they'll let him know what they decided to do or if he can come back to work or not. He found out that she went downstairs and bad mouthed him to some of the other employees, so he's upset about that tonight and the way it was handled. He said he was mad, but after I asked him to deal with them calmly he went back into the room and wasnt ugly about it really, but they could tell he wasnt happy.
So that's that I guess. Don't know if H will be working or getting paid if he isnt. He's counting on getting a job offer, so we'll see. I feel very calm about this and I don't know why. Maybe it's because I put it out there that it isnt my decision or my problem, it's his responsibility to work it out and make sure he's still doing his part to support the kids. Me, D11, and S19 went and did a little shopping tonight. H is watching Larry the cable guy and laughing. He had dinner cooked when I got home and has been a little stressed, but nothing major.
Normal evening here? Or maybe I just keep redefining my definition of normal to cope!
