Hey Sheila! Thanks much for this. You've really hit on some things.

If she's read some of the posts (you didnt say if you know how recently),

She said she read some quite awhile ago and again about six weeks ago. But who knows?


Your W... could it be the same at all for her? J slipping away and you slipping away. No job on the horizon..

I don't know for sure about J but it seems that might be the case from my limited ability to observe. I guess I'm basically thinking this because since we agreed she could bring her phone upstairs, I haven't heard it ring (except once and that was a call from her SIL). She also called him in the wee hours this morning to vent after our dust up, and I can hear if she's not quiet, which she wasn't. I'm pretty sure either he hung up on her or he said something to her and she hung up on him. But they've recovered from worse.

And whether she's read the board recently or not, she knows how gone I am. She was happy at first, but if she's feeling down anyway, maybe my moving on and possibly being happy without her makes her feel more alone? And resentful?


Is it anger time there?

This evening is good so far, but yes, she's definitely angry. Way angry. The stuff she was flinging at me would curl your hair (even more!). And she was just completely making up some stuff. It was unreal. I need J to come back and work some of his magic. C'mon, J, do it for the children!


...be a teflon rock and take the "I want stay in the house" as just more words/threats until she goes into more detail? I'm not saying that you wouldnt be smart to be prepared (lawyer), only that maybe the comment about her staying in the house doesnt need to be mentioned by you to her. Maybe act as if the plan remains the same and see what happens as you quietly explore your options?

I think that's exactly the right way to play it. I was thinking along those lines but hadn't crystallized the thought, so thanks for that! I almost sent her a short email today but I'm glad I didn't, especially since we're being civil at the moment. As long as L doesn't tell me something different, and I don't know why that would happen.

I've filed your email, you know not what you do!


...know that you are thought about!

Thanks, that really helps on days like this. I'm thinking about you too! If you string together a couple of posts without a good response I start to feel bad (but I fight it, so don't worry ). But you can rest assured I'm reading everything!

Have a great night...I hope you and H can each continue down your healthy paths and then, well, who knows?


Stop WaitingFeel EverythingLove AchinglyGive ImpeccablyLet Go