Lol Chrissy, I own a coffee maker, an espresso machine, a coffee press and a single cup maker (makes it into the to go cup) and i can't bring myself to get rid of it. I also have a toaster, foreman grill, griddle, waffle maker, crock pot, small rice cooker, large rice cooker/steamer...the list goes on and on. I'm a kitchen gadget addict.
Lou, yes I was torqued about the $700 shotgun, his only saving grace is that he isn't doing it right now and I think I can hold him off on it long enough to get "us" fixed a little and in to see a financial advisor to do a budget (note that I AM a financial advisor, I don't work in the field but I am trained, but he does not think I know what i am talking about) so I'm willing to let him choose the male financial advisor that he would like....knowing that any advisor worth his salt will not advise a purchase like this.
Email & MSN Messenger: Becca_1975@msn.com
Yesterday Is History
Tomorrow is a Mystery.
Today is a Gift.
That Is Why It Is Called "The Present"
I have a question for you. BB is going out on a shopping spree and sounds like she may not stop until she maxes out her credit card. It also sounds like she has held herself in check on the buying for a while now. Has this type of shopping orgy occurred before? Is there a pattern of abstinence for a period, then a mad rush to buy all she can?
My impression is that she has been waiting you out, knowing she can outlast you and that it is only a matter of time until she can get you to give in on purchases. Once you concede, she goes full blast, buying as much as she can while the getting’s good. She seems to know exactly what to buy, so I think she has planned this for a while. She was only waiting for the green light from you.
If this is true, she is manipulating you, plain and simple. I know you think everyone should do the right thing, but where do you draw the line on her doing the wrong thing? At this point, the buying is done (or is there more to come?) so your decision over who will pay for it. I’m betting she is thinking you will, since you always have in the past.
I would take hold of the finances. Get off all joint credit cards and checking accounts. If she buy something, let her pay for it. She might become a little more frugal if her credit rating is on the line.
Also, what reason is there not to? In the present situation, you get little to no sex, but she’ll spend you to the poor house. If you cut her off financially, you’ll still get no sex, but at least you’ll have your money.
I guess I am lost I was under the impression BB felt entitled to the money because she put into it also. Inheritance and retirement fund. Was all that already spent?
Quote: Okay why I who has no one in there house who drinks coffee had two coffee pots?
Advertising influenced you to buy the pot and you wanted one to be a good host because you lnew lots of people drink coffee.
Quote: I had to move the ice tea maker..... iceee machine the george forman grill(not used in two years at least) the dehydrator( used about twice in its life time) the lemonade maker( big waste of money used once) the chicken rotesiory maching(another waste of money to messy). And the deep fryer and all its lovely parts. Waffle maker....I decided the only other pretty useless item I could buy for my kitchen would be a ice cream maker. (Only one or would you buy two?) along with slicers dicers and tupperware that just about walks and talks. I have two of the pantry cupboards and over 22 cabnets in my kitchen and not enough space to put a dam tea maker without a major overhaul
Chrissy? Why don't you have 2 smoothie makers and 4 George Froman Grills? How about 2 outdoor grills?
Quote: Just the space finder and they are all in working order
A soul sister Chrissy. I am the family and my own space finder too.
The 5 beds at the Lou house were for BB and me. I never counted kid's beds.
Thanks for posting Chrissy. I was just razzing you a little about the 4 grills and 2 or was it 3 smoothie makers BB bought. She only has one now, the "Smoothie Max" with turbo speed and 200 extra watt motor. I always wait for some super-hero to show up when the smoothie maker gets used 4 times a year. The commercials for the smoothie maker boast about the machines power.
Quote: Inheritance and retirement fund. Was all that already spent?
No, the basics investments still are there. Much of the cash transfered is gone.
BB was a SAHM from 1969 until about 1980. In the 80"s she had a 2 hour a day job at the school lunch room. BB took a part time job at a hospital from about 1990 till 5/2004.
Our retirement fund: Since we were married I always put a little in our retirement fund that I managed. I worked full-time and a part-time job. BB saw the fund's value go up and down. She frequently got a little panicky when the marked dropped and wanted to sell what we had and go on a cruise or hoped we could get lucky in Vegas.
Also a lot of times BB wanted to buy lottery tickets with the hopes of winning. (Bad idea. The pay out in the lottery I know about will net you 25% of what you spend.) BB also wants to sell when it's tax time. She hates paying taxes. To her, the "rich people" have too much money anyway so should support the tax burden for the rest of the working people. Especially people like her with part-time jobs.
Usually her income paid for her pet interests, her personal items, but mostly went towards her wish list.
His and Her IRA's During the 80's instead of "OUR FUND", I decided to stop putting money in Our fund and set up a his and hers IRA's. I left the old fund as it was.
I set up a small IRA in BB's name to give her ownership in the market. She could see "Her" assets increase in value. I did it to quell some of the mild panic she felt during normal market fluctuations. I wanted BB to see the roller coaster takes a long, boring time to reach the top of a hill. I wanted BB to see when the market takes a drop there is a bottom and some of the momentum gained going down is carried over into the next upward swing and somewhere along the line if the company’s basics are sound, you eventually reach a peak again. I did this with the hope BB would see the long-term picture, not the short ups and downs.
When BB worked at her 2 hour a day job, that was her money. When she started to work at the hospital she did contribute to the household finances. I still had back problems and was in college or only working part-time. BB started her retirement fund at the hospital.
BB 401k/403b for non-profit employers. BB had her own 403b for 15 years. She did not put in a lot of money per paycheck but it added up. When the market took a dive and her investments were worth half of what they were at one time (still worth more than she invested) she wanted to cash, pay a penalty, be in a higher tax bracket, and go to Vegas "to have some fun." This was a sore spot for almost 2 years. The stock market went up and now she is happy she did not sell at the low point, but still talks about all the money she post on paper. She has twice as much as she put into it. Some people look at investments differently than I do.
Inheritance #1 BB mother died and left BB some stocks. MIL had $7,000 in her checking account when she died. BB spent it on ?????? There were bonds in the account that were called/cashed ($10,000) in and BB spent some of that on dental implants but the rest on ???????? We still have the stocks but spend some of the dividends.
Inheritance #2 BB's uncle died a year later and left BB some bonds. She spends some of the dividends.
BB's Retirement money BB gets $550/m from social security. Because she retired at 62 the amount is 60 or 70 something percent of what it would have been if she retired at 65. Much of it is her play money.
Is it all about money with me? No. Mostly it is about the turn over of items that are still good that get disgarded. In the front door, play with it till you see a faster motorcycle, a bigger screen TV, a grill that cooks 6 burgers when your old one cooks 4, then out the back door* for the new toy. *is the donation store or giving things away.
That is what I object to. It's the lack of appreciation for what we had that I worked hard for, even took part-time jobs to pay for things that I thought she and I wanted. I don't see much insight from BB for the work I did to obtain some of the things I / we bought together. In the last 10 years BB has been saying what I/we bought was not to her liking and now she is going to get what she wants. Back to the picky/close is not good enough, attitude BB has.
BB still considers my tastes and wants me to give her opinions about what I like and wants to have my input as to quality because she knows she goes for looks and misses some of the basic elements of construction.
BB said she apreciated me looking at the things at the store and did not like seeing me grumpy so decided it was her turn to do something for me. I took a shower and she rubbed my back for a while. Yes it led to sex. There is a certain amount of Zorba in me, let no offer go refused.
This AM BB said she thought having sex would cheer me up but thought I was still grumpy. She said sex was a wast of time, in a questioning fashion. I said no but do you think a little sex is going to fix my feelings about your shopping adiction?
BB said she wants to see me happy but wants to buy things "SHE" wants if I don't hate them (meaning pattern or colors).
My hope is, someday most of this "replace everything" mentality will end, hopefully soon.
The sex? Well BB said she was a little sore so I don't much will change with frequency. She did say she wants a better R with me but I have to let her buy what she wants.
It's sounding like I have given too much information and I have to go to work.
Lou, She did say she wants a better R with me but I have to let her buy what she wants.
Omg I would so use this.
Me BB is this a new spatula BB why yes it is I bought it today Me well I guess that means we will be having sex tonight then correct after all you want a better relationship as long as you can buy things. Me why BB is this a new crock pot BB why yes it is Me Well it looks like we will be having sex tonight and tomorrow morning. By the way BB do you need any money to buy any more little gadgets? I love all the relationship building your buying is doing. BB No I think I have everything I want
I went to Office Depot and looked at printers. Nothing close to what I would recommend. Some of the printers took a HP-96 ink cartridge (21ml) or a HP98 ink cartridge (11ml). The low priced printers only accepted the HP98 ink. If you put in a HP96 it fits but wont operate. The same higher priced version of printer accepted the HP96 or the HP98 ink. I think the stores are colluding with the manufactures. Everyone wants to cheat the public.
There was a HP-1200??? model of printer that took ink cartridges with 26ml but the printer cost $300.
I still would like to send that used printer to you. Shipping under $20 and you would have to buy the ink cartridges, another $65. No pressure. Do what is best for you.
Lil, I bought that printer at my last job. It was ok, did the job, slower than the big laser printers and it ran through ink a tad faster than I expected....the new toners on those are pretty spendy...if I remember correctly it was about $90-120. One lasted about 3 months with normal office printing....not heavy duty, maybe 20 pages a day or so.
Email & MSN Messenger: Becca_1975@msn.com
Yesterday Is History
Tomorrow is a Mystery.
Today is a Gift.
That Is Why It Is Called "The Present"
