Thanks, Hope, for your words of encouragement. These sympathetic posts really mean a lot to me, as there is almost no one that I have been able to talk with about this situation. (Eating and sleeping is the hard part; I’ve lost ten pounds!)
My H. just helped the ow move into her own apartment, and now I’m worried that this is going to make things even worse. Lately he has been more caring towards me, and even told me that he told ow that he is still in love with me. But their R. continues. I am thinking that this might be heading towards a long-term triangular relationship.
She continues to send instant messages when he is with me, sometimes just after he has returned from being with her, a couple of times after we had already gone to bed; one time the instant message asked him to call her, so he had to get out of bed to call. He had thought it must be an “emergency”, but it turned out that she just wanted to talk. He and I had discussed these calls and messages, and he had agreed to talk to the ow about limiting them unless there is some kind of emergency, but I guess the talk has not yet happened, and he says that he would have to turn off his phone and miss all his calls to avoid the IMs. Sometimes when we are driving down the road, his phone sitting on the dashboard starts emitting beeping sounds every 2 minutes, so then he has to read these notes and respond. It makes me crazy. But it also makes me wonder how needy the ow is and how co-dependent is their relationship. Maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part, because I’m still hoping it will just burn out. But I know he is still thinking it’s the real thing.
Any helpful words of wisdom, or even just sympathy, will be greatly appreciated.
