Sometimes the truth is so much easier to see when we stop going on emotion and start dealing in the reality of what is.
As you said in telling your wife that she would have enjoyed SC, when there is no neediness or urgency behind it we can carry on a conversation without the motivation to make someone see things our way. We all know how tiring and fruitless that is.
You are in such a good place right now. Oh I'm sure you have your moments, we all do. Although now I see in you the realization that it is better to have the right person in your life instead of the not quite right person. Whatever the reasons this happened to us, we really do need to do some long hard soul searching to understand the why's. It's got nothing to do with the sox on the floor or fact the that we weren't good listeners or even that we always have to get in the last word. For someone to walk away from a life, and in the process throw a whole heap of hurt and lies at us, just says to me a whole lot more about the person that we were married to than it does about us. I see the problems as much deeper than we ever cared to believe, and in most of these cases, unbeknownst to us, these are the very same problems that they have been hiding from the world and us of course since before we ever came into the picture. How could we change what we don't know?
I think from what you post you do see the whole picture. Once that happens, how do we go back while still being true to ourselves? No can do.................
