Okay replying to my own post. A couple of hours have passed since this horrible night in hell and while the pain is still great at least I have been able to take a couple of deep breaths and that has certainly helped.
It has also helped reading the many wise and heartfelt posts I have been reading here the past couple of hours. Have printed a few out and pinned them to the wall in order to gain perspective.
I would like your opinions please. Am thinking of doing a 180 althought the idea of it scares me to death because wife might interpret it as a threat or ultimatum, but to me it would feel more like trying to be okay about moving on without her though its nearly impossible to imagine.
My 180 is to suggest that my wife contribute to 50% of the cost of our counselling or I'm throwing in the towel and taking my son to live with me in Hawaii 3,000 miles away. Son says its what he wants too if we can't ever be a family. I think my purpose is to help her see she needs to take equal responsibility, but I fear I amy just be trying to force the issue. What if anything am I missing? What do I need to be doing? Is moving away a good idea? I have been waiting so long for her.
I am very lost, lonely and confused. Right now any contact or conversation with anyone would be greatly appreciated.
