Here seems to be my read on things. W seems to be sitting on a fence post, but not willing to fall either way. She doesn't want to be the one to break up the family, but wants to be able to have control over everything (call the shots). Since I am not a stronger leader then she is, I not going to cut the mustard, therefore I need to go. However, it's a catch 22. If I try to step up, then she fights me on that. If I don't do enough, then obviously I not strong enough to be with her. She wants someone to control her out of control life, but still let her call all the shots and do whatever she wants.
Not to bore you with details, but I got a comment from a lady the other day that went something to the extent, "your kidding me, W did that, she wouldn't even do something much smaller than that, which I asked her to do". "Has she done something like this before?" The answer I wanted to give was *&^^ no", but I just smiled. Can you say MLC, boys and girls.
What I have been building on is "AS IF". I am not letting her problem ruin my life. She will do what she does, when she does. She will be accountable for the damage she does. Eventually she will have to answer for her actions. In my eyes the most damage will appear in her kids and grandkids lives. As a coach of youth sports, it was usually fairly obvious to me which kids came from broken homes. If you talk to someone who is honest about their D, and has learned, they will be the first to tell you not to get D.
Like in your sitch WCW, it's a matter of when our spouse will learn, humble and change themselves. I guess this is where the waiting game begins.
