I don't think our desire frequency is out of balance. I'm happy with once a week. (if its good) and he is at least agreeable to once per week.
At far as helping myself to the "O", I used to do this occasionally with my first husband. He loved it. This husband would probably be turned off by that.
In fact, I'm sometimes tempted to tell Richard how I used to enjoy sex. In my first marriage, I used to have to try hard not to come to soon. My first H loved everything about a woman. Nothing turned him off. Unfortunately, he turns me off. It's so ironic: Sex was the only thing we got right in my first marriage and sex is the only thing Richard and I can't get right in this marriage.
