You aren't alone there either. My LDH and I have sex on average now about once every 4-5 weeks, and then when it does happen....like you it's over in about a minute. Very fast. Lately even when he does attempt to satisfy me manually first...there's absolutely no EC, no kissing, nothing other than trying simply to touch that one spot that he thinks gives me an "O". The lack of any real EC makes it that much more difficult for me to even get there.
It's a difficult road to walk as a SSS (sex starved spouse :-) Don't let your H get away with that self-depricating talk either, tell him you don't want to hear it. I find they often do that in order to gain sympathy from us...it's almost a way of distracting us from the real problem, because then we are busy feeling sorry for them.
Tell him there are things within HIS control but that he has to step up and do them. That's what I've done with my LDH. I've told him the path I see our M heading down, but that he's in COMPLETE control of which path our M actually takes when it does hit that fork in the road.
BTW...has your H been to see a Dr? If he used to be able to go for quite some time and now doesn't...I'm wondering why that is. My LDH has never been able to last for very long....but then again, he doesn't have sex but maybe once every 4-5 weeks either.
