Following my heart....

[ValerieA]

Hey, SE ~

I'm glad that you're aware of the financial benefit to him coming, but try not to dwell on it. Let his actions guide you there. It might always be in the back of your mind, as it is mine, but that is something that unfortunately only time will tell.

Yep, it's back there alright .

Hopefully once I see action, it will fade away more and more. Just like when H was unfaithful in our earlier years together before we were M'ed (EAs). I had forgotten all about it, and only recalled it when this last one occurred....9 or 10 years later. H obviously proved himself to me back then. Hopefully he can do it again.

That's great that he said that. The question is, do you believe him?

I want to, but again, it's going to depend on his actions. Will he meet my needs and wants? Not just tell me he will, but show me.

I didn't trust him at all after I found out he was talking (and who knows what else) with another girl back then, but something happened. He did something to get that trust back. Once that came back, my complete faith and belief in him returned also. I NEVER doubted his love for me after that.

To me, that sounds like a heartfelt apology from someone who cannot understand how/why he messed up so badly. That is a very positive sign. He knows he "got lost" and "doesn't know why he did it" great motivation for MC.

I find that interesting...I didn't see it as a positive then as I do now....I suppose that could be because I'm "tired of hearing it....I want to see it". H says he's sorry so much, so his apologies seem to be falling upon deaf ears.

Looks like I need to dig up my copy of DR again. It HAS been awhile.

Thank you, (((((SE))))). Really, thank you . This is such an exhausting and confusing sitch to be in. I find myself to be stuck somewhere in-between an LBS and a WAS. Absolutely draining at times, isn't it?

Thanks for listening.