Maybe with the present situation it kind of both of your faults. But I can certainly see where he kind of shames you into asking for anything or needing anything. But when he mentioned the present I would have said how nice.Or it is so nice that you thought of me. Then just mentioned to him that you need a safe vehicle for you and the kiddos to ride around in and it isn't safe if it is needing tires.

The hard thing about your finaces is it sounds like he controls the money and you basically have to ask for anything you need. It shouldn't be that way. Or at least he should give you an allowance including a little extra for things like tires or etc.

I would try to work on not feeling guilty to ask for needed things. Stand your ground with it. Raising children and taking care of a home and vehicles and everything else is expensive. What would he think if a divorce happens and he would have to give up 50% of that money of his anyway.

You may not be working outside the home. But being a SAHM isn't easy either. And if he was paying a maid and a nanny it would cost him a small fortune to pay for the things you do in the home. I was SAHM for many years. But thankfully money was never an issue for my hubby. But I am such a stubborn person if he ever acted like that I would have gotten a job and told him okay buddy day care is going to cost this much you need to pay it. I need to go to work to pay for stuff the children and I need. Or would have left the kid's with him where he had no free time at all and he would have had to babysit. It would have drove him nuts. UGH! Maybe just rock your husbands world with a threat like that next time he tries to shame you about money. I can guarantee he wouldn't be to happy with the cost of a daycare provider.