Well I tried these things before and on one trip I went on, this guy accosted me at a train station, kept putting his hand on my leg (without my permission), told me he would get on my train and follow me to the town I was going, tried to remove my 17 month old baby from her stroller, referred to himself as her 'daddy' etc etc. The staff called security but they couldn't find him.
Then, just 2 days later, I was followed back from a Christmas Eve Party and molested by a guy who was drunk, who just happened to be a member of staff, on the holiday camp I was at. I didn't report him, I was too ashamed, and spent half of Christmas Day in tears (that was in 2003 and the first time I had tried to socialise without Andy).
I'm disabled; the way I see it, I am a sitting duck, a target. Enough women get raped (1 in every 4, I was a counsellor for Rape Crisis), and I have already been sexually attacked once. My worry is, if I attempt to get a regular social life on my own, another creep might come along and finish the job off. I don't know how to feel safe, I can't even run if necessary.
I've never met anybody decent (aside from you guys on here).
Either that or everyone notices you're 'on your own' and everywhere you go, as soon as you walk into a room, people stare at you.
When I was in Cyprus, every time I went to the restaurant, people would come up to me and say, 'oh dear, are you on your own?' and I always got these married couples latching onto me so at the table would be me, DD4, and this couple in their 50's or 60's.
I began to feel like Shirley Valentine every time I went anywhere, as if it's an illness not to be joined at the hip to a man.
It seems perfectly ok for a guy to be in his 30's and single, but if a woman is late twenties, early 30's and single, people think it's abnormal. I hated being stared at every time I ordered a table for just me and DD4. I only eat out when on holiday now.
Having said all that, it hasn't put me off completely as I intend to eat at a pizza bar when I go to London soon and just before Christmas I will be away with DD4 for 4 days and will have a drink in this family bar. It's always packed with people.
BTW, I wasn't wearing the red lingerie at Andy's (never got chance). On the first night I was wearing jeans and a multi-coloured jumper, second night I was wearing a tracksuit (as it's loose fitting and I was sore from the operation) - but he wouldn't notice me anyway, too busy persisting in his friendships with all his women and getting off his face on those awful cigarettes.
