My wife of 23 years had a short affair this past summer while I was away for two weeks on Air Force reserve duty. She reunited with an old high school flame (classmates.com) and emails led to phone calls which led to a single meeting….I noticed the increase in cell phone usage and then uncovered some emails and confronted her. This is not the first time she has cheated on me. She has had two previous affairs with men that she worked with. She says she does not want a divorce. She says she loves me and that she doesn’t understand how/why she allows this to happen. I love her as much as I ever have…. And our relationship is good again….We are both working hard on our marriage… We seem to have fallen back in love again. We spend most of our time together and laugh and love a lot. Like anyone else I was constantly examining cell phone records and emails after the affair. My question to this community is how do I relax and let go of all the fear that this will happen again? She swears it won’t… that she will seek answers to why she has let it happen…(she is seeing a behavioral counselor/therapist) Of course I have a “hope” that it won’t happen again or I wouldn’t stay in the marriage. I’m open to any advice you can offer on how to relax and trust again…. I worry that eventually I’ll jeopardize the relationship with my paranoia. Thanks!
