I can understand what your saying Corri, I find it pretty much a turn off though for wanting to be envolved with someone when she smashes your your self worth and ego by turning you down time after time. I find extremely difficult to be civil let along show a sincer interest in a woman who has sent me to very dark and desprate places. I thank God that I was able to climb out of that dark hole. For me it's important that we "play of each others desire and passion". I can no longer carry the load with my desire.
Absolutely, I agree with you. I was just answering CeMar's question. I think the most heart-breaking thing I've ever experienced was to finally realize how my actions had affected my H, for truly, I had NO IDEA. Awareness can be a very painful thing... and it could be why so many LDs can not or will not see it. It's a pretty darn horrifying moment, and then to top it off, you have to figure out how to change yourself, to continue to try your best when your spouse is not yet willing to forgive or forget... they're still being their lovely obsitnate selves because they're afraid to hope, or afraid to believe the changes are permanent... or because they truly are azzholes. It's tough, no mistake about that.
Do not take my response to CeMar's question as an indication of some lack of empathy or compassion for the HD plight. He asked a simple question and I gave a simple answer. We all know the LD/HD experience is anything but.
