KML/Blueman/Flaneur/Kismet - Thanks guys...for checking up on me and making me feel better...I am still fumbling through all this.
Had a great talk with a male coworker last night. He's the same one that said that my H wants to "save face" by saying that I gave him no choice. I had great insight about how a man would think. He said that it's all about saving face. It's like he had fallen on the floor, but refuses to say that he fell, but instead said that he's trying to get a handful of sand from the ground. This coworker of mine, whom I shall refer as F really opened my eyes. When I was complaining about my H expressing his hurt about OW, (although I didn't express to H, I did vent here and to another friend about how insensitive H is to my feelings of his want of OW), F told me that it is good that he feels that he can tell me the truth. F also said that if he does it again, do NOT show that I am unhappy or angry, otherwise, he wouldn't want to express the truth anymore. F also advised that I should continue to do what I have been doing, be understanding, to not give any pressure. F also said that H must have thought about all these already, and he said yeah it'll hurt, but once my H gets past the WORST hurt about OW, it'll taper off and won't be that bad. Key thing is to be patient, no pressures blah blah blah..YEAH...THE DBING TECHNIQUES!! Another thing that F said was that (about the saving face bit...) H feels that he's been placed up on an altar, and by saying that he has no choice but to come back to the family, is like having a chair to help him down from the altar back to the ground. And I, as the W whose trying to get my H back to the right way, should steady the chair rather than pull it away from him. F also said that it would be good if OW starts to put the "guilty" trick on my H, then my H would start to retract from her fast.... Let's see...
Journalling... After my last post, didn't hear from H...thought that he was really upset with me (but knowing him, he can't really be angry with me long...never did in our 18 years together...it was always me holding grudges)...H called me up about 9.00 pm. I was still with F having dinner. H: Are your fingers in your pants yet? Me: LOL Nooooo... still having dinner. H: Okay then. Talk to you tomorrow. Me: Okay. You going to bed now? H: No..just leaving the restaurant. Me: Okay. Bye..nite.
Then when I drove back to my hotel, I saw a text message on my phone. H: Call me when your h*rny p*ssy is w*t n ready to be f**ked hard!! Me: Just got back to the hotel. Shower first. Give me 15 minutes. I'll call you.. H: F**ked yourself first. I wanna the h*rny p*ssy to be really wet first. Not long later, H called me, and asked "Came?" and I said that I wasn't even ready. And he said "Okay, call me". So, I did call him about 5 minutes later...and we did have a session of phone s*x And we hung up. I did send him a text Me: Can't believe that I am soooo h*rny. Anyway, Nite nite. Lots of Love, WIfey H: yep..u r h*rny. As for me, i'm as confuse as i was 9 months ago. Only difference this time is that i have to make a choice cause it's killing me. at least i'm doing well in my work. Me: But you've always done well in your work!! Nite nite.
He is still as confused as 9 months ago?? WTF?? I didn't want to acknowledge the "make choice" bit... Just in the morning, he said he's already made a decision since he has no choice, and in the night, he is still talking about making choices. WTF??? I think he is one real MR. YOYO alright. I just don't get it??!?? WTF??!? I am just gonna go on business as usual. Hopefully, with my continued calmness and zero pressure, and his tapering romantic love peak with OW will make him see the light. I have to leave him to his yoyo-ing....Can't help him there...
I don't know...maybe H needs a slight push...perhaps I will ask him this tomorrow "I am planning to talk to my boss about job prospects in Country X." And see if he reverts with "No..hold on please"... Or what do you gus suggest? Advice appreciated.
And we hung up.
