Hi Hopefloats7, Please don't apologise for being here. We are all in the same sad sitch. I am sorry for the pain I know you are going through right now. Your H may come around. Please, if you have not already, order some of Michelle's books. I have tayed out of my H's way...no phone calls, e-mails etc. He has called me several times just over this weekend and we even had a plesant dinner together Friday night. I may be a complete fool but I think he may be rethinking what his lifestyle may have cost him. I will wait and see as we have a mammoth amount of work to do before this R will ever be on solid ground again.I wish I could offer the wisdom to each of us to make our lives and marriages better but I am just as confused as we all are. I wake up every morning and ask God how in the world this could have happened. I only know that my faith, and letting go of the worry has given me a certain peace to get through this. Without it I would be totally destroyed.
My H first moved out 2 years ago. He was gone for 2 months but we were together nearly every day for dinner etc. He would leave and sleep in his apartment and I would see him the next night. It really wasn't so much of a seperation as a set up for a divorce that I am confident he and OW were planning.. I realise that now after confirmation from several lawyers. Be very careful and do not let him move back into your home until you are certain the affair is over and he comes back asking to work things out. I learned tha my H was talking to and listening to the OW and anything I said or did was wrong. I was, and still am, the enemy. This time, I kicked him out and told him I wanted nothing to do with him until it was over with her. He has been completely different. My assertiveness may have gotten his attention this time. any way my advise to you is to talk to your friends and family. My wonderful 82 year old mother has been my best friend and biggest supporter through this round. I never told her before and wish that I had. I do not know what I would do without good friends and supportive family. If you have that, talk to them. Don't worry about what your H thinks or says to you about it. After all, he certainly has someone to unload on! At the least, come to these boards often as it will not take you long to find wonderful friends and suporters right here.
Hang in there. Keep busy and keep smiling. I will keep you in my prayers. Sally
