"BUT, if he does that to us here...there's a VERY good chance he does that at home as well....and it's something that he'd need to work on. He probably doesn't want to hear that though."
A very good possibility. If you come across as being insulting and testy to people you don't even know who are offering help, how much more could it be to a person with which you are having a lot of problems, kwim? Maybe it isn't the case with TS, but we'll probably never know.
"where we recognize our own contributions to the problem"
And the second trick is recognizing which are actual contributions to the problem and which are just perceived contributions. For example, I was absolutely convinced for awhile that I had just killed attraction for my wife by being so low self-esteem. While I may have, I beginning to wonder if that is the real issue in her lack of attraction towards me. Gotta think about it and process it more.
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
