This still sounds like you don’t think any of this is her fault. Why don’t you just come out and say it – “She is a completely innocent victim, preyed upon by this other man, who forced her to pick up the phone, to meet with him and spreads her legs. Its not her fault at all!” Give me a break will you!
That's what it sounds like to you. This is not what I felt when I first found about the affair. My immediate reaction was that here is one other women who lies about relationships; who says she wants a trusting relationship with a kind, generous person but actually gives the most important part of herself to a macho jerk. Some, or most of the above, has come out from work with our pastor (I was the only one to see him, for one personal session and some followup emails). I remember one email in which he said he thought the point of our sessions with our therapist should not be "let's gang up and dump on ------ (my wife)". Most of these "insights" have come about by sessions with our MC. So, if you want to assign blame, assign it to our therapist, because he is the one who came up with them.
"The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places." - Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms, 1929.
