Oh my God, reading Nevanna's thread, I came to sooooo many conclusions.
One of them is like her, the part of me that pushed H away was my constant complaining about life and mood swings. Guess what? I "forgot" to do 180s on those so important points!!!! Actually, I was trying to do 180s on the pursuing behaviors, but not really on my negative traits. I still do the crying on the phone and being miserable about the whole thing. Plus I am impatient. I don't let things happen.
Her thread gives me so much hope since she is my age and her H acted so similar to mine.
It also gave me hope to see that if she could change, I can too!!!
