Re Cac4 I only meant to further explain, because most people don't get it. You get it; that's great. But most people see airplanes the same way they see a can opener. "what could possibly be the big deal??".
I know the industry isn't any thing like a can opener. I watched all of the history of aviation that was on the history and discovery Channels. The history of the helicopter was the most interesting. One of the Discovery Channels had "how to build your own plane and how to build a helicopter from kits. They also had learning to fly series.
I don't fly but want to fly small planes at one time. No money and I didn't see it happening because of money. I also limited myself because of lack of money. I decided being an auto mechanic was practical and something I could do.
Still no money, I was supporting my mother, and working 54 to 60+ hrs a week.
Fast forward 15 years, married with 2 kids and a house and bills.
During the day, I was service manager in a small shop and a line mechanic. I over worked and started to have serious back problems. I had a well equipped shop at home and a steady stream of customers there too.
My home shop had a decent inventory of parts, them one week i couldn't get out of bed.
I had back surgery, was off work for 6 months, did light duty for another 6 months.
I worked on the line (in the shop) for another 5 years then I am flat on my back again. I still have my repair shop and customers at home. I still have a good inventory of parts at home.
Well, the second back injury devastated me. I was a mechanic with two careers or at least two sources of income, and two sources of self worth.
In a short time both were gone. I felt I was almost nothing because I couldn't work and I spent 25 years getting to that point.
I quit high school to work. I got a GED, while working. After the second back fiasco, I went to college and earned a BS in 2.75 years with a 3.82/4.0 GPA. I still couldn't find work because of limitations due to my back problems and employers avoided people with back injuries.
I went a semester in a masters program but felt i had to go to work so took a 3rd shift job in a group home. Talk about a let down. Me, A top 5% of the class student and all I can muster up for work is babysitting some delinquent boys from 11PM to 7AM.
My point?? Not that I had something that I lost, but my road to mental recovery was not defining myself as something I wanted, but as something I could do in addition to what I lost or couldn't do.
Cac4, sorry about the loss of your aviation dream. You are more than that one dream. What are some of your other interests or abilities? You might find some peace in those. Wanting what you can't have, well you know it takes time and energy from getting something you do or might want.
Lil has some good advise and is a kind soul. I know it is difficult to let go of some things and learn new ways, but try. Sometimes it takes many many attempts to change or feel the benefits of change, so keep trying things till you find something that works for you.
