While as a whole I believe that initally I would find myself mesmerized by someone like your self. I wonder if your persona at some point in time would become overpowering. And tend to make me feel lacking within my self. I would like to believe that a persona like yours would motivate me and keep me challenged and open to new growth experiences. But I have to wonder if in truth if I would feel like I was running to keep up so I was not outgrown and cast aside
Sort of echo's the same things.
Man I may need to take up drinking coffee or eating ice cream if it has that kind of effect on a person!
Tried some pumpkin ice cream a few weeks back one bite was enough to make me say oh yuck and sputter for 5 minutes! Funny same thing happens at the store when I stick my nose right close to a candle I have never smelled before. I often yuck for about 5 minutes! Then I go about picking up another one and doing it again But I do love candles! (ramble sorry maybe your ice cream is effecting me too!)
LOL! Well, I guess if Chrissy and LFL say it, it must be true. That's enough hard data for Blackfoot to work with I'd say Ooooooh, pumpkin ice cream! I haven't had that although I love pumpkin bread, preferably with chocolate chips in it But of course, I'll eat anything with chocolate chips, chocolate chunks, chocolate sprinkles, chocolate shavings, chocolate sauce, you get the idea Ironically, have never used the chocolate sauce in the boudoir. Boy if I was LD I think I know how a man could get me to "perform" LOL!
Well LFL, glad to see you here again. very glad. Now I can pull your ponytail again. What was it you said? OK blackfoot Ill bite.
Get around to posting about you, soon. You never tackled the hard stuff in your sitch.
If you ladies dont knock off the food references I am going to the club, POP or not. Cruel and unusuall punishment. Chocolate sauce, GRRR (ala chromo), memories. Not nice.
Ill respond to you when if others post. Ill wait till tomorrow night. I am hoping for a male opinion.
Might even start to perceive him viewing me as inferior, that he could do better.
I dont think like that. I made my choice. When I do I wont break it. My beliefs/feelings on loyalty, commitment, honor, integrity are intrenched.
There is no better(if you chose wisely) , there is just different.
And any strong smart woman is going to show him, put him to the test. In fact, I don't think he would be attracted to anyone who didn't eventually test him He doesn't go for wallflowers. And thus, the Catch-22. He will continue to attract those very females who will kick him in the ass down the road
Are you drinking? This is vague and not clear. True about the attraction part but kick me in the ass? So I can pull really strong intelligent women but cant hold them?
methinks you dont remember my sitch or see something I am not.
"Ill respond to you when if others post. Ill wait till "tomorrow night. I am hoping for a male opinion.
Ah, yes. Very good, Blackfoot. I see you are now invoking Johari's Window and I commend you for that.
Here's a quick refresher on JW for you guys/gals:
Picture a window with 4 frames. The first frame is the open frame or "arena." The next frame is the "Blind Spot." The 3rd frame is the Hidden frame or "Facade." and the 4th and final frame is the "Unknown."
Blackie's entreaty here is to help him to reduce his "Blind Frame." in favor of enlarging his "Arena" or open frame.
I haven't yet profiled you BF as to do that justice (for myself anyway) I would need to read all of your 300+ posts to give you a somewhat useful observation.
Uh, yeah. Well, that would take up too much of Riker's Island computer time as well as my own before lockdown. .
(going back to an image I have from an earlier post of yours saying you could be some homeless guy using the library's computer for all anyone knew...chuckle-chuckle)
Anyhoo. Your posts on the MB have been enlarging your open Arena as you've spilled your blood--as we all have. The arena is what you and the rest of us know about your psyche...or at least your cyber moniker's psyche. And I appreciate your openness and candor; it's helped me in my sitch I think anyway.
You now want to reduce your 2nd frame, or "Blind Spot" frame, where you cannot see how others observe you. The more comments you get here the smaller this frame becomes and the larger your Arena becomes. Kudos on your effort of self-awareness.
Now, the 3rd frame, the hidden or "Facade" is the trickiest for me and others as it involves truths you know about yourself and your sitch yet we cannot be aware of/see. The anonymity and the medium (MB) themselves hinder our unadulterated/untainted glimpse within your psyche...not that that would be possible anyway. However, your apparent integrity, candor and honesty about you and your sitch have reduced this as well--enlarging the Arena once again.
Finally, (and you thought this would never end) since you are doing well to shrink your 2nd and 3rd frames, your 1st Arena frame is large enough to draw in the 4th frame, aka, "The Unknown" or things neither you nor we know about your psychological makeup. The answers you have received here/will receive in this thread helps you to chip away at this toughest of all frames and deposit those chips into your open Arena. It's a mutual discovery for all of us.
Will you ever achieve complete self-awareness? One (Arena) window pane? Probably not in this lifetime...but many monks have died trying.
So I hope you continue to offer insights on this MB while learning about yourself, BF. It's commendable and I wonder why in the hell my x can't even put forth the tiniest fraction of an effort like this before she considers "bringin' on the pain" to someone like me. And I know pretty much ALL of us here wonder the same; why the hell our Hs, Ws, SOs don't question their own behaviors?
I guess what I'm trying to say is... BF, if you get that D will you marry me? LOL. At least YOU can look past all the sparkly diamonds in my ring offer for a much deeper significance it would seem.
-Stigmata-
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
lay off the macho stuff a touch, open yourself up to your emotions, even the horrible ones, stop comparing yourself to others (and don't tell me you don't because I know that you do),
Well, I am going from wonder to wonder. First, BF replies and says we (he and I) agree on two things. Then, an actual female calls BF on his macho BS. Which is what I have done, but didn't get much of response, except from BF's "minions", who defended him with "what BF really means is . . . ." Whatever. So, "Cockiness can be attractive to a woman in the short term but long term, eh, not so much. It would wear on me after a while (can't speak for all women of course). I suspect my WS doesn't find cockiness as one of my qualities; no, I know she doesn't. She says I am shy, that she had to take the initiative to get me interested. I heard from one of her big-mouthed friends that she was almost frustrated at first by my hesitancy, even though she said to her friend "I think he likes me." All this, of course, before the affair. But, I think WS still sees me as not macho, and I am guessing that is what keeps us together. One must learn to keep silent sometimes. A favorite snatch from a Raymond Chandler novel:
Woman being interrogated by Marlowe and Police Detective: "I like this man (PD), he knows how to keep his mouth shut." (glaring at Marlowe).
Marlowe: "He's had lots of practice, m'am, he's married."
You guys wouldn't know me as diplomatic or choosing my words, since I am "verbally abusive", attack people on the board instead of supporting them, and am a Christ-killer. But this is cyberspace and our marriage is life. Why am I going on like this, since I know no one will respond anyway?
"The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places." - Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms, 1929.
Get around to posting about you, soon. You never tackled the hard stuff in your sitch.
Say wha? How much more crap can I dredge up. Enough already. Can't a girl just take a break for a while. Geez. Plus, I'm having too much fun telling you what is wrong with you I'm just giving you a hard time bf, but hopefully you know me well enough to know it's all in good fun.
Are you drinking? This is vague and not clear. True about the attraction part but kick me in the ass? So I can pull really strong intelligent women but cant hold them?
No drinking bf. Just caffeine high. And how is "He will continue to attract those very females who will kick him in the ass down the road" not clear? Seems pretty self-explanatory to me. You attract the very women who will rebel against you in the end. You SAY you want someone who believes in M, commitment, faithfulness, etc. Yet your attitude screams "player" and these women will sense that. So, not only are you attracting a certain type but a certain type of woman will also be drawn to you. The ones that tend to be independent, spunky, intelligent, like I said, not your typical wallflower type who is subservient to her man. You fight the very nature of the beast my friend. According to your logic, you would be attracted to a submissive woman as you are the dominant man. But no. You like a dominant woman. Maybe not in the bedroom, lol, but in other aspects of her life. So there you have it. Rip the analysis apart if you must. If that's what it takes to assert your dominance.....
But of course, I'll eat anything with chocolate chips, chocolate chunks, chocolate sprinkles, chocolate shavings, chocolate sauce, you get the idea 
