Oh boy. My heart ached for you over this meeting. I wouldn't put too much emphasis on the cruel comments he made. I bet they aren't authentic and are intended to hurt you{getting you back still?!}, and to protect himself from the pain that this expression is concealing. I could relate to a lot of what you've said here. I myself have written a half dozen letters that are left saved on my computer. Just when I think there's nothing left to get out - I can come up with yet another. And even if your grief feels like it cut as deeply as the beginning of this ordeal, I bet you'll find you bounce back and find yourself recovering quickly. And I so understand how you just need him to want you regardless. I struggle with that exact sentiment. Like ok fine it's over. I just want him to want me. It's such a devastating rejection by someone who was supposed to cherish you. I've always felt you were just a few months ahead of the same experience and conclusions than I. I was so excited for you when he agreed to meet, I thought he would have at the least some sweet things to say and would share some thoughts that would bring better understanding and some peace to the situation. Those dangerous expectations getting the best of us still. I respect and admire how you've handled yourself all along and I know the universe has better things in store for you than this heartache. And of course you cried. It's the awful reality in your face. It's the most he's had to say since "err. no thanks." Pick yourself back up when you're ready girlie. I'm thinking of you.
