Ok lets back up a little - just suppose he really didn't know what they were doing: You need to give him the benefit of the doubt ONE TIME. And let him make reparation by standing up to these so-called buddies and telling them what they can and can't do in his house. He needs to talk to them and he needs to NOT say "hey guys the wife is on my case..." he needs to say "I'm really pissed off with you guys, my little daughter was in the house don't you EVER do that again". If he can't do that then he has no self-respect and he is not protecting his family the way a real man ought to.
Maybe you can talk to him making it feel like you're in this together - We don't really know who did this but we need to sort this problem out - we need to protect our daughter. That kind of thing.
UUGGHH!
take care
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
