Hi, LL. I haven't posted much in ages, but occasionally I take a few moments and look around through some threads. I happened upon yours in another forum, and I was struck by your comment that you are mainly spending your time in the infidelity forum, "getting beat up." (forgive me if I got that wrong, but that was the main idea anyway).
So, I hopped over here, curious as to why anyone would be beating you up. I hope now, that you were just kidding. I hope that you do not feel beaten up at all. You may not realize it, but H2H is giving you a great gift here. She is not coddling you- she is prodding you along and calling you out on things.
To some that may seem harsh. Heck, I got accused of being too harsh all of the time in my postings! But, I wanted to take a moment to tell you this:
The posts that irritate you the most, or make you angry are usually the ones that you really need to read and read again. The ones that strike a nerve are often the most helpful- IF you are ready to move outside of your comfort zone and really listen to another point of view.
I know that there is lots of advice to be had here- some good, some bad. I do think, though, that people have the best of intentions. No one comes here to be cruel or to hurt anyone (I hope not, anyway!)
So, I hope you really don't feel beat up, and I hope that you and H2H continue this dialogue. I really think that it will open your eyes to something new. Others may not always have it exactly right- but with their great ideas added on to your own--well, you just might come up with the recipe for success.
If you find yourself with anger towards a post, really examine this reaction. I had to do that a lot in my posting days, and usually I came to see that I was too rigid in my thinking and I needed to explore other possibilities.
Best of luck to you, LL. You seem so sad, and I hope for better days ahead for you. As we all know (sigh), only WE can make that happen.
