you all deserve better. If your spouse is cheating (most epecially if you don't have children yet) there's no reason why you should 1. blame yourself 2. accept it and wait for them to wake up and come back to you
accept the fact that you deserve to be treated with respect and you are not getting it from your spouse at the moment.
if they cheated and are sorry and you are willing to work on the r with them fine
if they cheated and aren't sorry (or are denying it) move on.
you may be surprized to realize that when you suddenly respect yourself enough to expect better for yourself than a person who treats you with such disregard is when they will suddenly want to come back to you. My advice...unless they show that they are willing to face their demons and truly work on the r (not just come home and get back to normal) don't let them.
