Except you've missed a crucial point, Wes, he's NOT my spouse and he doesn't even want to be.
If I was friends, that is all we would ever be. It would be like eating a donut without the chocolate in the middle, or opening a present and finding the box empty.
I would be continously disappointed because at the end of the day, I look at him and he is my partner (in my mind). No amount of OW, years, fighting or anything else will ever change me on that front.
If I am 'friends' with him, the 'in love' feelings always come back and then I end up wanting him and wanting sex from him and if I have to be around him, I can't accept anything less.
In my opinion you can't go back to holding hands and chatting once you have become lovers. It's why I didn't keep a friendship with OM, because I know he would have thought the same.
Trying to be 'just' friends with your soul-mate is just too difficult. It just completely f**ks with my head. I remember you saying something similar about your XW.
IF we were actually partners and he loved me and there was truth and respect, then by all means, he would be my best friend.
I just don't see the point to all this. I mean, I take pity on him over his father and now I just feel as if he's taking the piss out of me, expecting me to go as an 'ex' with flippin' OW1 and Rose there. I mean, who does he think I am, some sort of turkey???
