Well as far as the visitation goes, I know with Andy whatever I accepted now would be permanent, as he has no job (therefore is available for the kids all the time), he home educates which means that literally all week, every week he has things on that he goes to with them, none of which he will give up to fit me into their lives - nor will he include me in what he does with them.
I would have no chance of ever getting him to up the visitation and if I amicably accepted his 2 days a fortnight , I would also shoot my chance of ever contesting in court (they would say you accepted, so you must have agreed with him).
Also, no court is ever going to up my visitation from what he offered when he's educating them as they will say that I am interupting their education. They even said that I should only get every other weekend so he could spend the other weekend with them, this in spite of the fact they don't go to school and he doesn't have a job so he sees them everyday anyway.
At that time it went to trial I had roughly 10 days per month with my children and they said they were going to reduce it to 4 days per month and effectively stop the 2 days a week of home ed I was doing with them at the time, after all the effort I was doing with it (EX-OW1 said I did it better than him, and she was dating him at the time).
I walked out of court in disgust and said to the judge that if that was all they thought of my imput as a mother, then I wasn't going to be one.
It wasn't actually the judge's fault, it was a really prejudiced court welfare officer who took a dislike to me from day 1 and they basically decide the entire case. The judge in fact agreed with me and said he knew why I was walking out and didn't blame me for it, but he hoped Andy would keep the door open for me if I changed my mind.
I have discussed it with Andy numerous times since then and he still says he would not give me more than 2 days a fortnight. So I am not under any illusions that he would up my contact.
The only way he would is if we were proper partners again and he allowed me to attend all the home ed stuff with them.
