I think Dr Phil would've said you had a problem with impulse control, but there is probably more there than just that. Life is about choices. You knew that when you had the affairs, if you got anything out of this bb three years ago. Time to work on yourself again - this time, from the inside. Or not ... your choice. At least, you seem remorseful, but you must've realised that when you were betraying your wife, you were also betraying your children, and their sense of security.
Good luck!
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim