Hey Sheila! You're really very good at rambling. Thanks for notice. I'd agree I'm very good at thinking and rambling, but not necessarily getting anywhere with it! Actually, journalling here inches me along ever so slowly. It's easier for me to type my feelings than to think them through.. and alot of times when I see it in type later I can see where I err in my thinking about things. I also measure progress and backslides. Mostly backslides lately unfortunately!
So, do you feel like you're making any progress at getting comfortable with groundlessness? I kind of am, and in a weird way it's almost a relief. Thinking that I don't have to force a situation into some kind of resolution. I can be okay, at least for awhile, out here in limbo. Oh Bud.. I'm not comfortable with groundlessness ;( It's scary stuff.. even when I tell myself that security is an illusion. How much do you know about being an idealist? I don't know much, but intend on doing some reading on it.. I think I'm way to idealistic in my approach to life. It causes me soooo many problems. H says all the time "I'm trying. It chaps my butt when he says that. I think.. trying??? If you know the answer, then just do it! I guess because to me, I'm either doing something, or not doing it in my mind. It's that security of extremes again. I've got to break loose from that somehow!
Matt... yes, he and his GF are pretty serious. We talk a lot about that. But, they aren't in lust thankfully! Or I should say, that they aren't being driven by that "I'm in love" thing. Both of them are solid as rocks emotionally and they have a very devoted friendship. Our families are close, so us and her parents keep a close eye on them. Have been rough spots with them going to schools three hours apart and missing each other but they are adjusting better than I thought. Thanks for asking.. they are so young, you're right about that. But as far as I know, they don't disagree on anything major, yet. and they are totally there for each other emotionally. They actively love each other.. its a wonderful thing to see. Hope it lasts, but if it doesn't I know they'll both be OK. Good heads on their shoulders!
Actually, journalling here inches me along ever so slowly. It's easier for me to type my feelings than to think them through.. and alot of times when I see it in type later I can see where I err in my thinking about things. I also measure progress and backslides. Mostly backslides lately unfortunately!
